Why dose realizing I missed a race make me panic?
I missed last weekends race. The root 66 one in ware MA; I didn’t realize there was a race till about an hour before the start of the race so I went through my panic mode for about 10 min till I realized that there was no way I was going to make it before the start. I was a little bit disappointed in myself and that I was so worked up and worried about it. I go to these races for fun (I thought) so why did I get so flustered. Am I on some ego trip where I feel I need to ride my bike faster than others to prove myself?
If I am alone riding fast and no one is around to see or care the ride
doesn’t feel quite as fulfilling as if I rode fast in a race that had an
official result and witnesses to prove that I had rode fast. So I guess
I to a degree I am a tool interested in trying to impress others. The need for acceptance is pretty common i suppose as humans are social animals, always doing stuff to be loved, get attention and respect. If I didn’t care what anyone thought of me I would always we wearing the same sweat pants, I would ever shave and I would fart, pick my nose in public and wouldn’t race as much (if at all).
I suppose the same competitive drive (need to win and prove yourself) that make a person driven also makes them more susceptible to getting worried angry or depressed when things don’t go as planned.